Eischen’s Chicken

Mention “fried chicken” in Oklahoma and it won’t take long before someone recommends Eischen’s (“eye-shuns”). Eischen’s Bar, out in Okarche, Oklahoma claims to have the world’s best fried chicken. Today, Dad, Mason and I decided to test their claims.

Okarche is 25 miles northwest of Yukon. Dad and I chatted during the drive while Mason played some Connect Four on his Gameboy. It’s a good thing he had something to keep him occupied; based on bad information I gleened from the Internet, we drove right through Okarche and on to Kingfisher, another 10 miles. Once we realized our mistake we doubled back to Okarche, arriving at Eischen’s just after noon. Somehow Dad was able to “deduce” where the bar would be, and he was right. Having an internal chicken radar is an invaluable survival skill. I have heard rumors of people waiting hours just to be seated, but on this particular Saturday morning the bar was only semi-full. We were seated and waited on immediately.

The best way to describe the building, both inside and out, is that it looks exactly like one might suspect a bar would look like in Okarche, Oklahoma (population 1,155, according to Wikipedia). The outside of the bar is red brick. The windows are tinted darkly, with neon signs mounted on them. The interior is as dark as it is old. Other than the two flat screen televisions showing college football games, the place probably hasn’t changed in half a century. One sign says no children allowed without parents; another one declares “no coffee or tea” — beverages are limited to water, cans of pop, and of course beer. In one corner stands a jukebox — in the other stands a vintage Pac-Man cabinet behind a worn pool table. The floor is intentionally covered in colored sawdust; why, I wasn’t sure.

The menu, mounted on the wall, advertises the bar’s half-a-dozen choices. If you came for chicken there’s only one choice: “chicken”, which is a whole chicken (two legs, two thighs, two wings and two breasts) for $10. If you’re looking for a side item I’d recommend the okra, seeing as though it’s the only side item. There were also two different sandwiches, chili, cheese nachos, and chili cheese nachos. People don’t go to Eischen’s for the variety; they go there for the chicken. Plates consisted of butcher paper, “carry-out containers” are a sheet of tin foil, drinks come in the can served along side styrofoam cups of ice, and there were no utensils to be found. The only thing missing was Patrick Swayze, randomly kicking people’s asses.

The dilemna dad and I found ourselves faced with was, is there such a thing as “great” fried chicken? Don’t get me wrong — everything was delicious, hot, and fresh, but both of us agreed that even the world’s best fried chicken is probably just good. And yeah, it was good, but I doubt we’d make the 50 mile round trip for it again (unless, we agreed, it was to show off the place to an out-of-state visitor). For what it’s worth I’d saw Eischen’s fried chicken is probably the best fried chicken I’ve ever had — and quite possibly, the least expensive. Whole chickens are $10, the okra (which you could easily split between 3 or 4 people) was $5, and Mason’s nachos were $5. If you’re a fried chicken connoisseur, by all means, make the trip.

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